The third degree: Treating the neighbor kindly and generously.
Treating the
neighbor kindly has a broad meaning that includes many kinds of virtues
and good morals which Islam commanded its followers to comply with. All
rights that a Muslim must fulfill towards his Muslim brother are, with
all the more reason, obligatory upon the Muslim towards his neighbor
brother; since he has the right of Islam and neighborhood.
These rights
include: To love and show affection to him, greet him, meet him with a
cheerful face, visit him if he is ill, escort his funeral if he dies,
support him if he is oppressed, prevent him from wrongdoing and
disobedience as much as possible, console and give him generously,
relieve his distress, assist him in his need, give solace to him in the
time of misfortune, congratulate him in the time of happiness, bring
happiness to him, give him a present, give advice to him and his family,
teach him what he ignores about his religion and life, exhort him
kindly, help him in obeying Allah, call and make him desirous to embrace
Islam if he is a disbeliever, take care and keep an eye on his house if
he is absent, not to pursuit him by sight in order to know what he
carries to his house, and to conceal what you know about his faults.
These kinds vary
according to the diversity of neighbors, occasions, the state of every
neighbor, and what he faces of the vicissitudes of the time be poor or
rich, notable or humble,. Among these kinds are kinds that are
individual duty, kinds that are collective duty and kinds that are
recommendable. [38]
The most important is that you must
treat him kindly with all that you can, by saying or action. Your
should wish goodness for him, love him as you love for yourself and
grant him a favor whatever its kind may be.
It is narrated
that Ibn `Abbaas, may Allah be pleased with him and his father, said:
"Three morals were recommendable in the sight of the people of
Jahiliyyah and the Muslims are the worthiest to have them. They are:
first, if a guest stayed at them, they would strive to treat him
hospitably. Second, if one of them had a wife and she became very old,
he would not divorce her for fear that she might not find the one who
would maintain or take care of her. Third, if their neighbor fell in
debt, or a difficulty or misfortune befell him, they would strive to
settle his debt and relive him of his distress." [39]
The Prophet,
sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, said: "O Muslim women! None of you should
look down upon the gift sent by her female neighbor even if it were
(Firsin) meatless hoof of a ewe (fleshless part of legs)." [40] The
meaning is that no woman should disdain a gift sent by her female
neighbor even if it is an insignificant thing, as the gift causes love
and removes grudge and spite. Its significance lies in itself as a gift
not in its value or price. So, the one who receives a gift must accept
it and must not disdain it even if it was an inconsiderable thing.
Ibn Hajar [41]
said: "This showed the exaggeration of presenting the small thing and
accepting it, and it did not mean the reality of the Firsin itself; as
gifting such a thing is not customary. That is, no woman should abstain
from presenting her female neighbor a gift because of its
insignificance; rather, she should present what is possible even if it
is a small thing, as it is better than nothing. Firsin is mentioned as a
way of exaggeration. Prohibition here may be meant to the one who
receives the gift; namely, she should not disdain what is presented to
her even if it is a petty thing. It is noteworthy that explaining the
meaning of the Hadith according to the most general meaning is more
suitable…
The Hadith,
encourages mutual gifts even if by meager things; since the considerable
gift may not be possible all time, and if the small gifts continue,
they will become great gifts. It also refers to the desirability of
cordiality and the removal of affectation."
In another place
[42], he says: "It is tantamount to mutual love and affection. It is as
if he says: 'The woman should show love to her female neighbor through a
gift even if it is an inconsiderable thing. So, the rich and poor are
equal in this matter.' The prohibition is addressed only to women
because they are the resources of love and hatred, and because they
react sharply in each case."
Abu Dharr, may
Allah be pleased with him, narrated that the Prophet, sallallaahu
‘alayhi wa sallam, said: "O Abu Dharr! If you cook broth increase its
water and spoon to your neighbors thereof." [43]
Al-Qurtubi [44]
says: "He, sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, has exhorted people to have
noble traits as they cause love and cordiality and ward off urgency and
evil. The neighbor may suffer from the aroma of his neighbor's cooking
pot. This neighbor may have offspring whose appetite may be whetted,
particularly the weak from among them. So, hardship and expenditure of
their guardian will become great, particularly if their guardian is a
poor or widow. Therefore, their difficulty, pain and regret will
aggravate. All these matters can be warded off by giving them a share in
the cooked food… The scholars said: "When the Prophet, sallallaahu
‘alayhi wa sallam, said: 'increase its water,' he gently pointed out to
the facilitation of matters with regard to the stingy. He made the
increase in what is of no price which is the water. So, he did not say:
"If you cook broth increase its meat," as this is not an easy matter for
all people.'"
The one who
passes the night sated and dyspeptic while his neighbor is hungry and
emaciated did not, surely, treat his neighbor kindly and generously. In
the authentic Hadith, the Prophet, sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, said:
"He is not a (true) believer who becomes sated while his neighbor beside
him is hungry." In another narration: "He did not believe in me who
passes the night sated while his neighbor beside him is hungry and he
knows that." [45
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